Her Time Has Come!

Every once in a while, you gotta shake things up and break away from the everyday and the old ways of doing things. And that is EXACTLY where I am going here.

Her time has come! Finished, over, done, see ya later, get out of Dodge, toast, and outta here!! Who am I talking about? The Cell Phone Lady. You know the woman that comes on and tells you what to do when you call someones' cell and they don't answer. She was once a very valuable tool, but her services are no longer needed. She barks out various instructions in a very nice tone about what to do, and what buttons to push and what to do when you're done. Truth is, we all know now. We didn't in 1995, but we do now.

I had a lot of respect for her during the huge grey cell phone era. You know when Home Improvement was on #1 on TV, and Bill and Monica were messing around. But that's an era gone by for good. She had a good run during the black bag phone era too, when you had the magnetic antennas on the roof of our Ford Contours. Back then only cutting edge professionals had mobile phones, but lots has happened since. But she's still saying the same old tired lines. Push this, push that, wait for the beep. C'mon! Everyone in the world has a phone now and we know the rules.

It's tough to see once proud pros's age and grow old. Once at the top of her game, the world has just passed her by. Instead of being seen as a beacon of cell phone hope and a light in the murky mobile phone abyss, now she's just an irritating bridge to insure we are kept on the phone for the entire charged minute. In fact that's all she really ever was, but no one had the guts to say it. So I said it. Even that is obsolete. Who on earth even worries about minutes anymore? That went out when Seinfeld went off, and Hillary was president at the end of the last century.

It's over. Her time has come. It's time to give us all the credit we have earned from listening to her for 15 years. WE GET IT. We know to start talking at the beep. Nice run kid, but you're done, see? Florida is calling. Go golf, garden, buy and RV....just quit telling us what to do. We already know!