MOVIE REVIEW - Piranha 3-D

Part slasher flick, part horror movie, part music video, part gore fest, and part comedy. That is this new Piranha 3-D movie.

Things must be a little slow at the Shue household these days. Elisabeth Shue stars in this total mess (literally) of a movie. Shue plays a local sheriff of a resort town in Arizona that has this gigantic lake where spring breakers come to visit a few weeks a year. Due to an underwater earthquake of sorts, prehistoric piranhas somehow find their way into this resort town and start munching down on everyone in sight. That's your story.

Should be noted this is a movie that knows how bad it is. It knows among the gore, the blood and graphic eating scenes, that it's making fun of itself and movies of this nature that proceeded it. Numerous subtle references to Jaws including a cameo from Richard Dreyfuss, fishing and singing the same song he and Chief Brodie sang on board the Orca in Jaws. Then he gets eaten. So there is the "we're making a bad movie here line." Plus tons of subtle parody of other stupid things people have done in other eat 'em up movies too. They do lampoon the genre, but virtually none of it really works.

Plus, if it's nudity you're looking for there is no shortage of it here. Pretty much from start to finish. Featuring a huge array of beautiful, young, well endowed women, most of them ending up being eaten by the fish or killed in some other awful fashion. As a matter of fact this may be one of the most graphic mass death by animal movies I have ever seen. Maybe Starship Troopers years ago with the bugs might rival it.

This is shot in 3-D, but there really was no need for it. In fact, it might even be a detriment. This movie has it all. Bad story, silly script, special effects that are not so special. It's not scary, or intense or anything good. It plain and simple is a bunch of naked, or nearly naked people getting eaten by a bench of angry fish. I get what they were trying to do, but it I feel will let down even the most hard core bloody movie fan.

Piranha 3-D The most tasteless movie of the year so far, and may be one of the most in recent memory. A huge flop at the box office, and not worth your 3-D movie money...keep that in mind, at barely 80 minutes. Horrible!